The Fear

Fear, according to Pixar and psychologist Paul Ekman, is a core emotion. It's a core emotion that makes it really hard for me to continuously create things. So in attempt to tackle the fear and relight the fire in my heart (and under my ass), I'm going to write about it. 

When I first started my blog, it was my intention to write about the things I find interesting, respond to articles and videos that are stimulating, and to all around get over my fear of creating and sharing things that I make. Ironically, after gaining traction and feedback about my work, particularly on my post titled "A Product of German Parenting", I suddenly became afraid. 

I was afraid to write something that was not up to the same standard as that one response. I became afraid that all of sudden all eyes were on me. I was afraid that I had now set a bar for myself to constantly produce perfect articles. I was afraid to do the thing I had set out to do in the first place. 

It's taken a little while to realise that all the things I was afraid of are ultimately just going to help me be a better me and produce better work. I don't need to be afraid that all eyes are on me because let's be real, everyone is trying to live their own lives anyway. I don't need to be afraid of setting myself a high bar because it just shows what I'm capable of. And lastly, I definitely don't need to be afraid of putting myself out there because not all judgement is bad judgement. People are always going to judge me, but whether or not I take that to heart is another story. 

It's been a solid two months of filling up my drafts folder with pieces I deemed "not good enough" to share, but that will no longer be the case. With my new found confidence, I am determined to do what I first set out to do - get over the fear and create.